I was looking up Ian on Facebook to find the dude I met recently. And look what came up.

The first three Ians in the search results seem to have company in their profile pictures. Coincidence?

Someday, when I’m older, I will no longer be horizontally challenged. Here’s proof.

Meet George Lucas, the 33-year-old visionary film-maker about to embark on history’s most prolific science fantasy movie.

If you notice, his build is somewhere between skinny and normal. Watch some Star Wars documentaries or buy the book to see his figure in other angles.

This is how he looks like today.

Its not like he threw himself into an eating disorder due to depression. It seems like nature just took a toll on him.

Speaking of Star Wars, let me throw in a before-after picture of Carrie Fisher. (Ignore Jabba the Hut, I’m not that cruel)

Now take a look at young Benjamin Franklin.

And now old Benjamin Franklin

Check out his celestial belly. He may be a founding father of a great nation, but it seems he needed to spend more time running around with kites.

Here’s a video that depicts my possible reaction should I one day wake up and realize I became fat.

You want scientific proof? Here it is.

Its tragic, but is it inevitable? Will I eventually gain weight no matter how healthy I eat? Am I doomed to a figure that resembles an integer less than 1? Will I see my toes again?

Only time will tell. But sometimes, time needs to shut up.